Scars Build Character
I am quite certain this is the unspoken mantra at LE3.
If we look around at the world of business and careers, it really is fascinating. In an attempt to become successful, climb professional ladders, scale companies, influence others, drive efficiency, invent and innovate, we are all left with one common denominator.
Broken humans trying to make a living and the world a better place, one job at a time.
Okay, some people only work for greed and clout, I get it. But I choose to believe people are inherently good and mean well. So, for this read, just assume we humans are all clothed with good intentions.
I love LinkedIn. I love the support. Being totally honest, Kelly and I could not do what we do without LinkedIn. So many trying to build a brand, share passions, connect with others, looking for the next opportunity, and be an esteemed and respected voice. Maybe we spend more time than we should scrolling through updates, leaving comments or trying to understand the looney algorithms that dictate what pops into your news feed. Perhaps your significant other does not understand your logged minutes on LinkedIn.
After active weeks where we witness increased activity on our pages and receive kind comments about our successes, one thing keeps rising to the surface. All this looks great, BUT the unexposed and background of how we end up supporting clients and companies in the space is wildly random . Often messy behind the scenes, built upon Zoom calls where we look disheveled, kids screaming in background, unruly animals, off camera because we are in cars doing life stuff, late nights in the dark or early mornings when you peel yourself out of bed because we didn’t complete the task from the day before. It’s not glamourous, but it sure is thrilling.
It's cool to talk about the easy stuff.
The fun stuff.
The wins.
It’s groovy to put the good stuff on blast and also celebrate with other peers and colleagues the happy blasts!
But here is the real stuff. This bloody mess in one small image, but symbolizes something much larger.
Scars are The Window to a Soul
I fall down a lot. I am clumsy as the day is long. I am ungraceful, an unnatural runner according to my college soccer coach. It is just a part of me. Because of my clumsiness I earned the nickname of “Scar” in college. Needless to say, I still have not outgrown the nickname. Every scar tells a story. I earned them, and by golly, If you know me, there will be plenty more to collect.
For every success we have had there is a scar and real-life story that most likely looks unpleasant and less than desirable. For every week that looks great to others, there is a week that looks bleak and dull.
It seems a bit ironic that we sit in the space to assist companies to sort out some of the internal kinks and roadblocks. We love digging into the details, looking at workflows, asking tons of questions, all in search for how we can partner together to improve the daily workings of life for older adults. But does it not seem ironic?
Two broken people hired to remedy something that is less than perfect. Interesting, right?
If we want to move this industry forward and talk about disrupting the space, we must first look inward and recognize that we all need a bit of fixing and disruption in our own life. And guess what, it is much easier to fix something or someone else than it is to fix yourself.
It is easy to point fingers and talk about how slow this space innovates. How resistant we are to change. How residents and clients are not truly satisfied. How we have a product Baby Boomers do not want. Or the fact that we operate assets that need millions of dollars of renovations to even look desirable.
A Graceful Lens
But what if we changed our lens and realized that the scars that may seem to plague us are also the beautiful elements in this space? What if we are slow to change because we fear innovations will deplete the people side of the business that lured the majority of us from the beginning? What if we are resistant to change because we have not stopped long enough to practice self-care and the resistance is merely tiredness and a lack of energy preventing us to even consider trying something new.
What if there was an element of grace bestowed upon this world of aging services as we collaborate together to create an enhanced version? I have to think people are tired of being beat up and put down when they feel like they are doing the best they can.
For those of us urging new paths and clamoring for new approaches in aging services, we must show our vulnerability. We may think we know all the answers, but most likely we are as personally broken as the professional problem we are trying to resolve. Luckily, we get to sell our companies and people on the strengths and skills we possess, all while hiding the struggles that encounter every morning.
So, just remember when things look good on the outside, you pass a mom and two kids on bikes running as if this is a daily exercise of quality family time and well-being, just know that around the corner you may find her splat on the pavement, licking her wounds just trying to make it back home and keep an eye on the other little one so he does not get run over. See, at that point, I am the irresponsible mom, pushing a tiny bike next to my 5-year-old, taking up prime road real estate midafternoon rush hour, letting the other kid ride way too far ahead out of eye’s view. Both broken and whole at the same time.
Celebrated successes are always by unexposed scars and unseen challenges.